Palwal Darshan
Palwal is a small district in Haryana with a big geographical importance. It is located at 60km from Delhi towards south,30Km from Faridabad,50 Km from Gurgaon,90 km from Mathura and it is entirely located on NH2,well connected via Road and Rail.
Here are some extracts from the region which will bring out true humor and make you laugh out loud.
" Bol Bansi Vale ki Jai....Deh Pola"- is the first sentence you'll hear if you dare try to talk to a Palwal local boy.. Due courtesy goes to its being nearer to the Brij Bhoomi(Mathura) and Lord Krishna is the deity the local people worship. Hence the name 'Bansi Wale' which is the synonym of Krishna.
Next if you travel in the EMU from Palwal to New Delhi, and if you dare ask for the seat. The reply would be: "Mamma, khado reh, banao toye TT"....
Every third person in Palwal is the relative of the Local sitting MLA. When ever a police man catches some one notorious, the first thing he utters is:"Ruk ja, chacha ae phone karan de" and the universal chacha is Hon'ble MLA saheb.
'Un' is the most common word they attach as a suffix with every other word. Ex:
Latta+un = Lattun
Kapada+un = Kapdun
Bartan+un = Bartanan
Hotel+un = Hotelun
Bus+un = Busun
etc...
Hindi 'Yeh' becomes 'Yako'
Hindi 'Veh' becomes 'Vako'
Patwari is known as the highest post ever acquired by the villager.
'Safari'-The car becomes 'Supari'.
Dowry becomes fashion and in the local caupal they brag:"Phoola ki bahoria, chore ke liye Sakoda, Dewar ke liye Pulsur aur Phoola ke khatir Tractor layi Se". (Now can you imagine the entire cost of marriage?)
I don't know becomes "Moa na patau". "Mahare college mein ek bahut maluk chori padhe hai"-(Come on,translate it in Hindi....)
An Eighth class boy writes I love you for a girl in blood....(Where did he get this info from.)
The town is full of Beauty Parlors, Hair Cutting Salons, Public Schools, Computer Centers and Nursing Homes.
Famous Names of Beauty Parlors: She, Vina, Pearl, Kusum, and the people represent them as She Wali, Vina Wali, Pearl Wali etc.
Famous Names of Hair Cutting Salons: Sitara, Paris, Chandani, Chaman etc.
All the Hair cutting salons have there small kids working, as soon as you enter he'll say "saheb bahut phunsi ho rahi hai,bleech kar du". Come on....have a chill...
There are a lot of movie talkies and they all are registered warehouses of 'X' rated films...You'll find the common posters of them hanging everywhere....
Some of them are:
1) Jungle ki Hasina,
2) Shadi Basanti ki, Honeymoon Gabbar Ka
3) Katil Jawani
4) Padoson Ke Jawle
etc.
"Sexy Taxi Mili sadak Pe, Pata Mila Na Basti Ka,
Sari Raat Haath Na Aayi, Utar Gaya Maza Masti Ka"
The School names are also fascinating.
They write DPS for Dharam Public School. G Convent for Geeta Convent (Hindi Angreji Sangam). MVN for Madav Vidyalaya.
DPS,G D Goenka...all big name schools have come up...
Their fees : 1 lack admission fee and 3000 per month for a nursery class kid. Even there is a waiting list for the same.
A scene at the school:
School Receptionist(to the old man who have came to get his grandchild admitted): "Sir, Pls fill this form, in order to get your child admitted"
(and she handed over the 2 page form)
Tau(to the lady):"Arree Madam, yo form hi bharna aata to main teri jagah na hota, nue bata pise kitne dene hai"
Every child of the household is now studying Engineering. Getting admitted to BA is a crime. BCA is a hot favorite amongst girls.
(the one who scores 33% in SSC board is a dude in Engineering college with Tere Naam style hairs swinging over the forhead)
Till the Year 2007 there were no technical college in the town. Today it has 15 Engineering colleges.4 Management colleges and 2 Dental colleges coming up. Imaging the pace of work.
The names are: Satya Collge of Engg., Mohan Sharma College of Engg., Ramajunam College of Engg., etc.(even i am planning to register a college name on my name.....isn't it look cool).
My personal conversation with an Engineer of Palwal.
Me:"Yaar, tune ECE kyun liya, CSE aaj kal hot hai."
He:"Yaar, Jo baap ne bola wo le liya, mujhe bada pata hai"
Me:"Kyun, Enterence nahi diya tha kya"
He:"Pagal hai kya, Director baap ka chela hai"
Me:"BE ke baad naukari karega kya"
He:"Uska bhi jugad baap karwa dega"
(Good luck to all the IITians.....Palwal Engineers are coming)...
Scene at the Computer Center:
Name of the Institution - Skyhigh Computer Education
Tutor's Qualification - 10th from Bhiwani Board,
English Speaking course from Dadi Ahiyala English Speaking center,Palwal
All the male candidates come to see Madam ji speaking English(Khata khat...Fata Fat)
If a girl speaks with a boy, then she becomes 'Cheli' of Him. Eventually he becomes 'Shaligram' for the other boys.
This is the area where markets names are Camp and Sheher. (I still wonder why?)
This is the area where owing a Mobile shop means 'Apna Business hai Mobile ka'.....Tin Tin Tidying....
A shop keeper in Camp owes a Ladies Glossary shop and he is an Engineer from Hissar. (Good work dude.....the future is here)
Marriages are only meant to be held at the biggest open banquet hall even though the guests list are 250.
The household names are Chauhan,Dalal,Dagar,Baisla.
A Rohil Bal styled jeans which is peculiarly cut at knee's is termed as 'Fate Hue Latta'
If a girl is standing at the Palwal Bus stand alone, two guys will come from nowhere and ask "Kahan ku jayegi Madam".
The Maxi cab running between Palwal Sohna and Palwal Bahhabgarh will say they are going Gurgoan and Faridabad and eventually put you at Sohna and Ballabhgarh. If asked they'll say:"Aaj permit no hai saheb".
The one liner written on the back of Tata 407 is "Ya to nue ie Chaalegi".All the maxi cabs have the permit to pack them with 15 passengers-the symetry is Front Row: 4+1(Driver), Middle Row: 5 and 6 people at the back(diggy), often the diggy have a small moodha to accommodate a child. The best part is they have a tape recorder which plays thunder songs like "Hat Ja tau pachche ne","Patla Duppatta tera muh deekhe" etc.
Some of the Haryanavi Classics like: Dhakad Chora, Badla Jat ka, Haryanavi Sholey, Chaudhary ki mooch etc.
Palwal district court has over 2000 advocates and it very much looks like a Home Guard Akhada with people wearing Black Gowns.(Palwal wale called it as Kala Choga). Its due courtesy goes to nearby Mathura and Agra Colleges.If you are worth nothing, you can be a lawyer in Palwal court. These people don't know how to write an application but they are all big time advocates.
'Love Marriage' is still a taboo and if someone does the same,it becomes the talk of the town overnight. The so called 'Samaj Ke Thekedar' calls it a sin till the time they find that there son\daughter has eloped with the inter caste girl\boy.(This makes me give a sheepish smile as at these testing times there principles take a U turn.)
At the Annual Trade Fair held at Pragati Maidan Delhi-A sign board reads-"Kutton aur Palwal walo se savdhan".
Going a little ahead-the signature word is 'Andy'. 'Ghana Andy kona pakke' (Can somebody guess what does it mean?)
'Totta' in Delhi becomes 'Gandashe' in Haryana.
It is the land of hulligons and law offenders.
This drastic change in behavior comes from the selling of agriculture land at huge prices. 1 acre goes from 1 crore to 3 crores. Scorpio is a car which is a tractor for them.They load Bersum(fodder) into it. The people are out of their own and don't know where to spend such an amount.
Happy Visiting Palwal......
Disclaimer - The views are personal. The thoughts expressed are in lighter vein and if anybody takes it seriously, he is doing it at his own peril. The author will not be responsible for any of the ill feelings you develop about the place and any legal action taken. If the data used belongs to any body, then it is purely coincidental and the author's intention is not to hurt any body and harm the authenticity of the place.
Here are some extracts from the region which will bring out true humor and make you laugh out loud.
" Bol Bansi Vale ki Jai....Deh Pola"- is the first sentence you'll hear if you dare try to talk to a Palwal local boy.. Due courtesy goes to its being nearer to the Brij Bhoomi(Mathura) and Lord Krishna is the deity the local people worship. Hence the name 'Bansi Wale' which is the synonym of Krishna.
Next if you travel in the EMU from Palwal to New Delhi, and if you dare ask for the seat. The reply would be: "Mamma, khado reh, banao toye TT"....
Every third person in Palwal is the relative of the Local sitting MLA. When ever a police man catches some one notorious, the first thing he utters is:"Ruk ja, chacha ae phone karan de" and the universal chacha is Hon'ble MLA saheb.
'Un' is the most common word they attach as a suffix with every other word. Ex:
Latta+un = Lattun
Kapada+un = Kapdun
Bartan+un = Bartanan
Hotel+un = Hotelun
Bus+un = Busun
etc...
Hindi 'Yeh' becomes 'Yako'
Hindi 'Veh' becomes 'Vako'
Patwari is known as the highest post ever acquired by the villager.
'Safari'-The car becomes 'Supari'.
Dowry becomes fashion and in the local caupal they brag:"Phoola ki bahoria, chore ke liye Sakoda, Dewar ke liye Pulsur aur Phoola ke khatir Tractor layi Se". (Now can you imagine the entire cost of marriage?)
I don't know becomes "Moa na patau". "Mahare college mein ek bahut maluk chori padhe hai"-(Come on,translate it in Hindi....)
An Eighth class boy writes I love you for a girl in blood....(Where did he get this info from.)
The town is full of Beauty Parlors, Hair Cutting Salons, Public Schools, Computer Centers and Nursing Homes.
Famous Names of Beauty Parlors: She, Vina, Pearl, Kusum, and the people represent them as She Wali, Vina Wali, Pearl Wali etc.
Famous Names of Hair Cutting Salons: Sitara, Paris, Chandani, Chaman etc.
All the Hair cutting salons have there small kids working, as soon as you enter he'll say "saheb bahut phunsi ho rahi hai,bleech kar du". Come on....have a chill...
There are a lot of movie talkies and they all are registered warehouses of 'X' rated films...You'll find the common posters of them hanging everywhere....
Some of them are:
1) Jungle ki Hasina,
2) Shadi Basanti ki, Honeymoon Gabbar Ka
3) Katil Jawani
4) Padoson Ke Jawle
etc.
"Sexy Taxi Mili sadak Pe, Pata Mila Na Basti Ka,
Sari Raat Haath Na Aayi, Utar Gaya Maza Masti Ka"
The School names are also fascinating.
They write DPS for Dharam Public School. G Convent for Geeta Convent (Hindi Angreji Sangam). MVN for Madav Vidyalaya.
DPS,G D Goenka...all big name schools have come up...
Their fees : 1 lack admission fee and 3000 per month for a nursery class kid. Even there is a waiting list for the same.
A scene at the school:
School Receptionist(to the old man who have came to get his grandchild admitted): "Sir, Pls fill this form, in order to get your child admitted"
(and she handed over the 2 page form)
Tau(to the lady):"Arree Madam, yo form hi bharna aata to main teri jagah na hota, nue bata pise kitne dene hai"
Every child of the household is now studying Engineering. Getting admitted to BA is a crime. BCA is a hot favorite amongst girls.
(the one who scores 33% in SSC board is a dude in Engineering college with Tere Naam style hairs swinging over the forhead)
Till the Year 2007 there were no technical college in the town. Today it has 15 Engineering colleges.4 Management colleges and 2 Dental colleges coming up. Imaging the pace of work.
The names are: Satya Collge of Engg., Mohan Sharma College of Engg., Ramajunam College of Engg., etc.(even i am planning to register a college name on my name.....isn't it look cool).
My personal conversation with an Engineer of Palwal.
Me:"Yaar, tune ECE kyun liya, CSE aaj kal hot hai."
He:"Yaar, Jo baap ne bola wo le liya, mujhe bada pata hai"
Me:"Kyun, Enterence nahi diya tha kya"
He:"Pagal hai kya, Director baap ka chela hai"
Me:"BE ke baad naukari karega kya"
He:"Uska bhi jugad baap karwa dega"
(Good luck to all the IITians.....Palwal Engineers are coming)...
Scene at the Computer Center:
Name of the Institution - Skyhigh Computer Education
Tutor's Qualification - 10th from Bhiwani Board,
English Speaking course from Dadi Ahiyala English Speaking center,Palwal
All the male candidates come to see Madam ji speaking English(Khata khat...Fata Fat)
If a girl speaks with a boy, then she becomes 'Cheli' of Him. Eventually he becomes 'Shaligram' for the other boys.
This is the area where markets names are Camp and Sheher. (I still wonder why?)
This is the area where owing a Mobile shop means 'Apna Business hai Mobile ka'.....Tin Tin Tidying....
A shop keeper in Camp owes a Ladies Glossary shop and he is an Engineer from Hissar. (Good work dude.....the future is here)
Marriages are only meant to be held at the biggest open banquet hall even though the guests list are 250.
The household names are Chauhan,Dalal,Dagar,Baisla.
A Rohil Bal styled jeans which is peculiarly cut at knee's is termed as 'Fate Hue Latta'
If a girl is standing at the Palwal Bus stand alone, two guys will come from nowhere and ask "Kahan ku jayegi Madam".
The Maxi cab running between Palwal Sohna and Palwal Bahhabgarh will say they are going Gurgoan and Faridabad and eventually put you at Sohna and Ballabhgarh. If asked they'll say:"Aaj permit no hai saheb".
The one liner written on the back of Tata 407 is "Ya to nue ie Chaalegi".All the maxi cabs have the permit to pack them with 15 passengers-the symetry is Front Row: 4+1(Driver), Middle Row: 5 and 6 people at the back(diggy), often the diggy have a small moodha to accommodate a child. The best part is they have a tape recorder which plays thunder songs like "Hat Ja tau pachche ne","Patla Duppatta tera muh deekhe" etc.
Some of the Haryanavi Classics like: Dhakad Chora, Badla Jat ka, Haryanavi Sholey, Chaudhary ki mooch etc.
Palwal district court has over 2000 advocates and it very much looks like a Home Guard Akhada with people wearing Black Gowns.(Palwal wale called it as Kala Choga). Its due courtesy goes to nearby Mathura and Agra Colleges.If you are worth nothing, you can be a lawyer in Palwal court. These people don't know how to write an application but they are all big time advocates.
'Love Marriage' is still a taboo and if someone does the same,it becomes the talk of the town overnight. The so called 'Samaj Ke Thekedar' calls it a sin till the time they find that there son\daughter has eloped with the inter caste girl\boy.(This makes me give a sheepish smile as at these testing times there principles take a U turn.)
At the Annual Trade Fair held at Pragati Maidan Delhi-A sign board reads-"Kutton aur Palwal walo se savdhan".
Going a little ahead-the signature word is 'Andy'. 'Ghana Andy kona pakke' (Can somebody guess what does it mean?)
'Totta' in Delhi becomes 'Gandashe' in Haryana.
It is the land of hulligons and law offenders.
This drastic change in behavior comes from the selling of agriculture land at huge prices. 1 acre goes from 1 crore to 3 crores. Scorpio is a car which is a tractor for them.They load Bersum(fodder) into it. The people are out of their own and don't know where to spend such an amount.
Happy Visiting Palwal......
Disclaimer - The views are personal. The thoughts expressed are in lighter vein and if anybody takes it seriously, he is doing it at his own peril. The author will not be responsible for any of the ill feelings you develop about the place and any legal action taken. If the data used belongs to any body, then it is purely coincidental and the author's intention is not to hurt any body and harm the authenticity of the place.
Bahut hi Badiya Sir Ji.
ReplyDeleteHamesha ki terah yha bhi cha gye!!!
there is a story of a little girl,
a small girl go to temple & say
?
?
?
?
A,B,C,D,..............X,Y,Z
and say to god I m not very intelginet like other people and do not remember those mantras to pray. but have only feelings. plz plz make best prayer frm my side from these alphabates.
Purely this happens when you have endless feeling for someone but dont have any words.
Same happens in case of whenver I read smthing frm u. I jst filled with endless feelings
So Finaly,,,
A,B,C,.......X,Y,Z
plz plz make best words for u as i cant wrap my all feelings in words for u sir ji